My Deviant Son

Let me get this out first: My son is four years old. He just started Kindergarten last week. He turns five in about a week and a half. He has been suspended from school. Ouch.

I am not meaning to be flippant about any of this. I will get to what he did. I just think that it is both serious and somewhat normal. Remember throughout this that he is four.

My son put his hand down the back of a little 's pants. Wait, that is not entirely correct. He put his hand down the back of two little s' pants.

First, I don't disagree with him being kept at home for today. As the mother of three s as well, I wouldn't be too thrilled if it happened to them. However, I would understand that they are really young and that sometimes children do incredibly dumb things for fun.

The parents of the little s are understandably ticked. They are looking at us and imagining the worst. Let me tell you that my husband and I are not training my son on a Sunday morning to wreak havoc among his classmates. I am completely mortified that he would behave that way. I believe that there is discipline that needs to be meted out.

This is the point that upsets me: we live in a world where our kids can barely play outside because we do not know our neighbors. I am looked at strangely when I tell my children that the reason that they can't go over to so and so's house is because I do not know their parents. I have had discussions with other parents about what I would rather my children not watch. I'm not a control freak... we just have set standards for our children. Shows today are a lot different than when I was little. There is a TV show that is all about lesbian teenagers. It is on at a time slot that my children could watch. I'm not going to deny that things of this nature are occurring in the world, but I don't necessarily want my children to learn about them on TV.

Which goes back to the question, "how could my son do such a thing?" I think the answer is "innocently because he thought that it was funny". That may not satisfy anyone, but I know my son. He is a prankster that needs to learn his lesson on this one. He thinks that everything is funny and normally has a great sense of humor. I think that he just never crossed this line before. He is having to learn that what he did was entirely inappropriate and can't happen again.

The thing that I want to avoid is the lasting consequence of this. I want to discipline my son while protecting him. I don't want him to freak out later on when he is older that he can never touch a . My husband and I have opinions as to the timing of that. We will teach him accordingly. However, I do not want him to think of himself as evil as the other parents want him to. I want him to know that he made the wrong choice, took the wrong action. He can do the right thing next time. He does not have to make the same mistake.

I just wish that life were a little simpler again. I think that we have complicated child rearing past the point of recognition. I take responsibility for disciplining my son. Trust and believe that he knows what I think about his actions. I feel terribly that these other families have to deal with this, especially since it seems to have affected them so severely. I hope that they can forgive my son and be okay. If not, I will have to send him to private school to get away from his "reputation". I am being serious here. I already know how parents are nowadays. Everyone freaks out over everything. I think that the process of learning what is appropriate has been stunted by my over protectiveness. I'll do what I can to fix it. I just hope that this all works out alright.

Love to you all out there, Muffinhound